Lament - to feel, show, or express grief, sorrow, or regret.
Thank you. I have three offers from great companies. Even if the job postings are appealing, I am grateful because what if I didn't get any at all?
If I had no choice but those three, I think the decision would be clear, but the fact that I have a choice to reject them all and wait for a chance for something else makes the situation all that more daunting.
Lord I pray that I get a reply about the work schedule for one of the positions. And I pray that the project would not require that I finish late. And, please make a way for me, Lord. Make a way for me.
"I know the Lord will make a way for me. I know the Lord will make a way for me. If I live a holy life, shun the wrong and do the right, I know the Lord will make a way for me."
I really don't know what happened. How have I drifted this far? I don't know my way back. I really need You and You know this. Please, bring me back to You.
I am low in faith and strength. I don't remember how to be strong, I don't remember how to be kind to those who are not kind to me. I don't remember how to love. I don't remember how to trust, not even how to trust You. I don't remember how to be me.
I feel like I've lost something; I feel so empty inside. Like I've said many times, I can't see three steps in front of me.
I want You back. I feel so alone. I'm crying all the time. Without notice, without warning, without reason I become overwhelmed with sadness and negativity. I don't want that anymore.
I have less than 12 hours to decide which job offer to accept, or whether to reject them all for a chance of finding something else.
I don't know what to do because I can't hear you. I don't know if it's a matter of lack of faith or lack of trust in You but if I can't hear You, how can I know what decision to make?
During the time with Microsoft, I honestly believed I heard You say "Yes". It was undeniable, it was so strong, it was so loud. I thought it was You. Even when I felt that I didn't perform so well, I still had faith that You would give this to me.
But when I learned that I did not get a job offer from them, yes, I was naturally disappointed, but what really hurt me was being wrong. I was so sure it was You saying yes. But I was wrong.
From that point on, I can't help but doubt who it is that is speaking to me. Is it You, or is it just wishful thinking; that I want something so badly, that it's just me saying "yes" all along.
And then, You were gone. Silent.
I know I've disappointed You. I know I've ran away from You. I know I've rejected You and have even been ashamed of You.
But now I am ashamed before You. I'm ashamed to come back to You after all that I have done. But I don't want to keep running away.
I just need You to point the way, because I really don't know where You are. I just can't hear You anymore. And even if I did, I just can't recognize Your voice anymore.
With these job offers. What should I do?
Give thanks with a grateful heart; give thanks to the Holy One. Give thanks because He's given Jesus Christ, His Son.
And now let the weak say, "I am strong," let the poor say, "I am rich," because of what the Lord has done for us. Give thanks.
Right now I need you even more. I always need you but right now I'm just so confused. I don't want history to repeat itself. I've learned my lesson for sure about how to control my actions and reactions, but the same types of feelings are there, and I want them gone.
Thank you for always being there for me, and sorry for all the times I lacked faith and disobeyed you.
Thank you for answered prayers and forgiveness of sins. All glory to you :) Excellent marks on my midterms, interview with Microsoft, *something secret I don't want to mention* heheh and many more blessings you have anointed me with. :)
Those who believe that they believe in God, but without passion in their hearts, without anguish in mind, without uncertainty, without doubt, without an element of despair even in their consolation, believe in the God idea, not God himself.
~Miguel de Unamuno
"Where are You?"
or
"Where am I and where are You taking me?"
Why do I feel like I'm going to look back and regret all of this?
Is this you're doing? Should I be rest assured you're leading me to something good? Or is it I who is leading me down the wrong path?
Some light please :(
Once again, I can't see 3 steps in front of me. I don't know where I'm going.
If I know it's you leading me, I will follow. But I don't know.
not to think about you, LORD,
or even mention your name.
But your message burns
in my heart and bones,
and I cannot keep silent.
- Maude Royden
— Kay Arthur
"Once you’ve had the taste of flight you forever walk the earth with your eyes turned skyward, for there you have been, and there you will always long to return."- Leonardo da Vinci
-- Terri-Anne
God these waves are so much bigger than me.
The whole of your existence cannot be summed up by a cruel word said in haste by a person having a bad day. Don’t ever give someone that much power
-- William McGill
Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow; it empties today of its strength.
-- Krystal Meyers
— David Platt
-- Oswald Chambers
— Jon Foreman
If you realized how powerful your thoughts are, you would never think a negative thought. — Peace Pilgrim
"God is your Creator, not your concierge; your Saviour not your slave. He is God not a genie. You exist for Him not vice-versa."
I'll forgive, I'll be nice, but what we had would never come back.
God help me, everything is contradicting. It's a multi-way contradiction. Nothing makes sense. What I want, what You want, what they want, what is, what ought to be, what could be, what could have been....
IN THE NAME OF JESUS
THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU
Good right?
Please fill in the blanks. I'm anxious to see what I got in the other two courses. Anything less than an A- will be very upsetting.
I don't need to know everything; I don't want to spoil the surprise.
I just need to know what direction to head in; what I should keep doing, start doing and stop doing.
I don't want to waste my time. I only have one life on earth.
Will I be happy, successful, will I find true love?
Will he leave me?
And to those that answered yes.... when?
Maybe I don't need to know when. Maybe I need to know, "for how long".
I don't know.... Bottom line is, should I even bother?
Far better it is to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs even though checkered by failure, than to rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy nor suffer much because they live in the gray twilight that knows neither victory nor defeat.- Theodore Roosevelt (26th president of US (1858 - 1919))
Those who are only there to take take take: drop them.
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me! (Phil 4:13)
It's amazing the timing You have, and the amazing love You have for me, and most importantly the promises You keep.
Your promises are found in Your Word and the words You speak to me.
I can't go wrong when I follow and trust You.
So, I get two of my marks back, and I see *drum rolllll*
And not just that, but while studying for my last exam, you sent a friend to pass me a copy of their formula sheet! Without it, I would not have time to practice the problems because I'd be spending the entire time writing it out!
I left all my exams feeling confident!
Now I just need to await my marks, but I believe I surpassed my expectations.
But even if I didn't, I have nothing to fear because I know that You are on my side! Your plans for me are not to harm me but that I should prosper! (Jeremiah 29:11)
Thank You for everything!
Please, calm my nerves, help me to concentrate and not get distracted. Help me to understand and remember the material, Lord God. And please, give me the strength and energy to study for this. I've had lack of sleep and all this studying for my other exams have really worn me down.
Thank you, amen.
Thank you for providing me freedom; freedom to come to you for forgiveness, acceptance and freedom to worship You.
- Leonard Ravenhill
We’re going to get into this Word and eat it. It’ll hurt us at times but it will revive us. It may unclothe us to clothe us, empty us to fill us, cast us down to lift us up and yet this is all we need.Cause I want to know my Father in heaven more. I want all of him.
“If I opened up my heart And revealed all that I am Could you really love me Unconditionally And if I gave you all my trust Even though my world’s been crushed Would you really love me Would you really love me I’m so afraid I’m so unsure I don’t want to hurt anymore But still I know that I need you Jesus”
THEY LAUGHED AND SCORNED HIM AS HE DIED
THE HUMBLE KING THEY NAMED A FRAUD
AND SACRIFICED THE LAMB OF GOD
I've been recently feeling an spiritual need to be around Christians my own age, and I know exactly where to find them. But I fear that when I begin to put my emphasis on them, I will forsake the spiritual needs of my unsaved friends. When I really think about it, I'm not really doing a good job leading a good example for them anyways. Rather I find myself following their wordly examples.
God help me. I guess I need to find a balance. It's hard when school is occupying so much of my time, attention and energy. I guess I can change that for the summer.
Though I'll be working full time, all thanks to You, I'll do my best to devote some time for You and for my spirit.
Help me to remember all that I studied: definitions, concepts, advantages, disadvantages, applications and so on.
In the name of Jesus, Amen.
The Gethsemane scene is one not soon forgotten. While the disciples slept, Jesus anguished over the events to come. His heart breaking, his eyes pierced into the heavens as He cried out to the Father, "and his sweat was like drops of blood falling to the ground" (Lk.22:44). In His struggle against sin, Christ had been tempted even as we are, and yet He did not sin (Heb.4:15). He resisted sin. He knew His purpose, and He knew that the lives of others depended upon Him remaining obedient to God. In our struggle against sin, perhaps we fail to see the impact our sin has on others. We often see the consequences of our actions primarily as it pertains to ourselves. But to see beyond ourselves may provide the very motivation we need to resist sin--even to the point of shedding our blood. Another´s life may depend on it.
My finals are coming up. I don't want to be scared. I want to come in prepared. Help me to remember what I have studied. And now, help me to study! It's so hard to keep focused.
"The steps of a good man are ordered by the LORD, And He delights in his way." - Psalm 37:23 NKJV
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." - Jeremiah 29:11 NIV
Yes indeed. The other day I thought about this: not only did I get the job I had my eye on at the time, but now I know why You didn't let me go to work outside of the city. Everything worked out!
I get to take that summer course, which leaves me room to take C++ in the Fall Semester! And not only that but I get days off in my schedule!
This is what could have been: either I would have gotten a job that wouldn't fulfill my potential and/or would take me long to travel each day. Or, I would have gotten the really good job (or so it seems) outside of the city (several hours away from home), so I wouldn't be able to take that summer course, and in the Fall, I would have a bad schedule and I wouldn't be able to take C++ to prepare me for next Summer's job.
Wow, You worked things out perfectly! And in my gut, I feel like I will get the job outside of the city next Summer. But who knows, maybe You have even better plans for my future.
I can always count on You to look out for me, and to care about the details of my life.
Great things happen when I place my trust in You.
ME: Actually, no. I do not take Your grace, mercy, love, sacrifice, salvation and forgiveness as a free pass for sinning. Though I know that if I sin, Christ will stand as an advocate to plead my case for forgiveness, I can't take what You've done for me for granted. And the very fact that You will forgive me each and every time motivates me to try my best to sin less. The cruelest thing to do is to hurt someone you know will forgive you. Lord, Sovereign God, Father, I don't want to hurt You. But I need Your help. I can't promise that I'll never sin again because it is in my nature; in my flesh. But I can promise You this: I'll do my best to live for You and to follow and trust You at all times, because You are in me; in my heart, in my soul, and in my mind.
— Psalms 65:3
“The concept of the Bible as a bunch of disconnected stories sprinkled with wise advice and capped off with the inspirational life of Jesus seems fairly common among Christians. That is so unfortunate, because to see the Bible as one book with one author and all about one main character is to see it in its breathtaking beauty.”— Joshua Harris
Do not put your trust in princes, in mortal men, who cannot save. When their spirit departs, they return to the ground; on that very day their plans come to nothing. Blessed is he whose help is the God of Jacob, whose hope is in the LORD his GodPsalm 146:3-5
I find it sad, almost pitiful, that people will give up on You based on the actions of men.
Ok, people who claim to follow You, and even those who genuinely do, may make big mistakes to hurt people. A very popular example are the allegations with Priests, and other "hypocrites of the church".
Why are people's focus on men (man kind) ? How do their sinful acts nullify Your Word?
You have told us not to place our faith in men, but to place our complete faith and trust in You and You alone.
Some people don't even read the Bible, but rely on the words of their Priests are "religious leaders". No wonder so many are lead astray and weakened by situations as these.
Come on people, yea we have leaders to help guide us, but we are to pay attention to what they say and make sure it's in accordance to what God says!
These leaders are not a replacement for God; they are sinners just like you and I.
God, help them. Open their eyes!
God is the most generous, loving, wonderful, attractive being in the cosmos. He has made us with free will and he has made us for a purpose: to relate lovingly to him and to others. We are not accidents, we’re not modified monkeys, we’re not random mistakes. And if we fail over and over again to live for the purpose for which we were made—a purpose, by the way, which would allow us to flourish more than living any other way—then God will have absolutely no choice but to give us what we’ve asked for all along in our lives, which is separation from him.— J.P. Moreland
not perfect but i strive
towards perfection.
a sinner saved.
the beloved of Christ.
daughter of Christ.
the girl who’s been hurt but continues to try and
love with all my heart
no matter if it hurts because
Jesus loves me.
broken but made whole
in the hands of my savior. a worshiper.
a girl trying to be the best
i can be and seek after
the heart of God and
change the lives of the
people around me by
showing them to God
because without God I am nothing
So here's he final tally:
17/20, 17.5/20, 19.5/20, 16/20 :)
17/20, 17.5/20, 19.5/20 and the last one, well... I'm waiting for my teacher to revise my mark.
But thank you for coming through for me. Thank you for giving me the strength to strive and to not give up. I need that kind of strength in more areas of my life.
This is why I have this blog. I don't need this for you to hear me, I don't even need to think them yet you know what I will pray for.
I have this as a record for me; I record my prayers when I am in need, and feel all hope is gone. And then I record my thanksgiving and praises to you when you see me through.
This has really helped. When I begin to lose hope, I read what I have written here, and I know that you've never let me down.
You don't always give me what I want, but you always give me what I need. And I thank you for that because I know that many of the things I wanted were not good for me.
Thank you for everything!
Therefore I will call upon you, I will come and pray to You, and You will listen to me as You always have and always will.
I always seek You will all my heart, and You are never far, but always near.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH! You always come through for me. People think You don't exist, or that You don't care, that You're too busy, but those are all lies from the enemy.
You are always here, waiting for us to seek You, to call upon You, to love You, to believe in You and to trust You.
I trust You, I need You, always.
THANK YOU, JESUS
THANK YOU, LORD ALMIGHTY GOD
YOU HEARD ME, YOU LISTENED TO ME AND YOU ANSWERED MY PRAYERS.
YOU GUIDED ME TO THE RIGHT PATH, TO THE RIGHT DECISIONS.
For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart." - Jeremiah 29:11-13
Lord prepare me for this; prepare me for battle Lord, with the right things to say.
Well, Lord God, if it is Your, please let me find a good job this summer for my internship; one that would be relevant to my career goals, where I can gain great knowledge, skills and experience, in the Name of Jesus.
Not my will, but Your will be done. But I send out my plea. I know You know my prayers before I pray, You know my requests before I ask, You know my tears before I even have a reason to cry, and you know my smiles, even when I feel that I can never smile again.
But this, I pray, Lord God. This is what I want. I just pray that this is what You want for me too, and pray that you will provide for me, just as You have graciously and generously and faithfully provided for me before.
Thank you.
Please, from your everlasting and unlimited supply of love, pour some into my heart; renew it so that I may be able to continue to love others; no matter how much it hurts.
Why couldn't everyone love You and be like You?
The world I see around me is so contradictory to the world I belong to.
It's hard to make sense of it all.
I've tried everything and nothing helps. I'm at the end of my rope. Is there no one who can do anything for me? Isn't that the real question?
The answer, thank God, is that Jesus Christ can and does. He acted to set things right in this life of contradictions where I want to serve God with all my heart and mind, but am pulled by the influence of sin to do something totally different.
"God's ultimate plan was as far beyond our imaginings as the oak tree is from the acorn's imaginings. The acorn does what it was made to do, without pestering its Maker with questions about when and how and why. We who have been given an intelligence and a will and a whole range of wants that can be set against the divine Pattern for Good are asked to believe Him. We are given a chance to trust Him when He says to us, "...If any man will let himself be lost for my sake, he will find his true self."- Elizabeth Elliot, Passion and Purity
"I do not at all understand the mystery of grace — only that it meets us where we are but does not leave us where it found us. " - Anne Lamott
Lord, help me to carefully live the life You want me to live, and to be an example to others.
To be a visible and tangible representative of Your Son, Jesus Christ.
Someone once said, "A good example is someone who knows the way, goes the way, and shows the way."
I'll never be perfect as long as I am in the flesh, but help me to follow You wholeheartedly, so that others will experience Your love through me.
like a rose, trampled on the ground. you took the fall, and thought of me. above all.
You took my place on the cross. Thank You
— Ephesians 5:2
But "It's in Christ that we find out who we are and what we are living for. Long before we first heard of Christ and got our hopes up, he had his eye on us, had designs on us for glorious living, part of the overall purpose he is working out in everything and everyone. " - Ephesians 1:11-12
“ Unfortunately, too often God’s servants choose to avoid the truth or make it more palatable to the world. Either leads to tragedy. ”— Back to the Bible [By: Tony Beckett and Woodrow Kroll]
Satan is a craftsman when it comes to telling lies. The cleverest lies always sound the most like the truth. Anybody can tell a lie and yet not be a good liar. Even a clock that doesn’t run is still right twice a day. But a clever lie sounds the most like the truth. Therefore, a clock that is five minutes wrong is far more dangerous than a clock that doesn’t run at all. A clock that is five minutes wrong is so near the right time that it can cause you to miss that airplane or be late for that vital appointment. If you look at a clock that is five hours wrong, you say, “That must be wrong. Somebody tell me that time it is.” But the clock that is five minutes wrong is the most dangerous.
Now, Satan tells the cleverest lies and the cleverest lies are the most like the truth. And yet they are diabolical lies. Not only is he the most clever liar, but he tells his lies about the biggest subject — God. Satan wants you to get a wrong understanding of God because if you get a wrong perception of God, he has got you where he wants you.
Well how much longer can they continue lying to themselves?
Are they really, truly satisfied?
Well, I guess so, considering people don't know what they are missing until they have it, or gain it then lose it.
But, fine, if they say they can live life to the fullest without You, who do they expect to take them to heaven?
If they don't need You at all, who can they count on to give them eternal life?
And for those who don't believe You even exist, well, Lord, I leave them in Your hands. If there is something You want me to do, tell me. Otherwise, as the old saying goes "May God have mercy on their souls".
Hah, I don't know if that was very appropriate, but I like that line, especially in movie lines.
But all jokes aside, Lord, open their eyes.
Open mine too.
I make a promise to try my best to follow Christ's example and to live as He did, and to live the way He wants me to.
And if I stumble, I know I can cry out for help, and He will help me back up.
ME: Lord, neither will my love for You walk away.
Teach me to love the feeling of having these words flow from my soul to my heart to my mouth, so that they may enter the ears of my friends and flow to their heart, to their soul. I love it, but it's strange, awkward, uncomfortable when they don't know You, don't love You...
It's wonderful hearing Your wonderful name; Your life-giving Words.... It's amazing. Music to my ears, a song to my heart, a healing spring to my soul.
"I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you." - Psalm 119:11
I'm so ashamed.
Yet Your word says there is no condemnation for those who are in You (Romans 8:1)
It's not too late; this is a season of Mercy.
The wrath of God is coming. His anger about the sin of the world is soon taking place. Our Husband is coming as all-encompassing Judge sooner than we think. Let us not be ignorant and see the things happening around us, the natural disasters, the persecution of the Church, as things that are “just happening”. Nothing “just happens”. God’s hand and God’s will is behind it all. He sees what is happening, and it is happening for a reason. Let us not be so wrapped up in ourselves that we forget what is at stake. There are still millions who have not heard the true Gospel, there are still millions and millions who do not know the love and infinite mercy of Christ. The justice and wrath of God are coming. he is coming soon to redeem His bride, to rescue us once and for all from the sin and devastation of the world. And in that time, we will all be judged for every word not spoken in love. How much are we loving? This is all that will be counted. How much are we loving? Are we leaving our brothers and sisters in the cold? Are we considering them already damned? Are we, by keeping silent, sentencing millions to eternal damnation? We have a choice. There is still time. This is the season of Jesus Christ’s Mercy. this is the season of rescue and repentance. it is a season for us to speak up and preach the word of God boldly, to not shrink back, to tell of the all consuming flame of love that lives inside of us. This is not a time to sit idly by while millions die without knowing why they were even alive. Pray. Speak your faith boldly. Show acts of mercy to others. Pray. Both for the living, and also for the dead.
You have the power of the uncreated God alive in you!
People are often unreasonable and self-centered. Forgive them anyway. If you are kind, people may accuse you of ulterior motives. Be kind anyway. If you are honest, people may cheat you. Be honest anyway. If you find happiness, people may be jealous. Be happy anyway. The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway. Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough. Give your best anyway. For you see, in the end, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.
- Mother Teresa
The video I posted before was removed by youtube. Here is a part of it, plus more, with a song.
For nation shall rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom: and there shall be famines, and pestilences, and earthquakes, in divers places.
All these are the beginning of sorrows.
Tsunami in Asia, Hurricane Katrina in the US, Earthquakes in Haiti and Chile, other divers disasters, War in Iraq, civil wars in the Sudan and Congo... just to name a few.
The signs are playing out.
Lord, please, help the people who are being affected by all this. Save them Lord God. Please, be with them.
But all this is worthless if they don't have Christ in their heart.
I tried to make a rhyme out of this. Hah! But I couldn't find the proper words. I'll think about it some more later.
It reminds me of the song that goes like this:
Christmas without Christ, there's no Savior, there's no joy. Christmas without Christ, there's no reason to rejoice.
Why sing about the baby in the manger, when the baby doesn't live inside your heart. Why celebrate the season, if you have no reason. Why bother sending all those Christmas cards. "
All I am and all I ever will be: A good and kind friend to all.
“Religion is man’s attempt to reach God, while Jesus is God’s attempt to reach man.” — Jerry B. Jenkins;
I like that. And it's true. You are already extending out Your great and mighty hand to us, inviting us to spend eternity with You, in a relationship with You, to dwell in Your peace, yet people are foolishly ignoring Your hand and holding out theirs. Hello? Makes me wonder who they are reaching out to.
But then again, they aren't reaching out to You. They are reaching out to a lifeless, powerless, self-image god they have created.
While others, are reaching out to You! Ignoring the hand of the very God who died for them, because they don't know You. They heard lies about You and and while they are running from You, they are in fact searching for You; for truth, something that is real and beyond them; the missing piece to the puzzle of their existence.
Religion, man's attempt to reaching You... When all You want is a relationship with them. Us.
You made it so simple, our sins have been paid for, why do people make it so complicated?
I'm overwhelmed; too many midterms and too many assignments!!! I just want the coming week to be over!
But I also want to excel. Lord, please help me to concentrate, focus, understand and remember everything I need for the coming exams and assignments.
"Success comes before Work only in the dictionary".
Focus, Focus, Focus
When the heart is changed, the law is not a burden, but done out of love for God.
When I will read this chapter, open my eyes to what this means according to Your word.
My misgivings arise from the fact that I search within to find how He will do what He says. My doubts spring from the depths of my own inferiority. If I detect these misgivings in myself, I should bring them into the light and confess them openly— “Lord, I have had misgivings about You. I have not believed in Your abilities, but only my own. And I have not believed in Your almighty power apart from my finite understanding of it.”- Oswald Chambers, My Utmost for His Highest
I think it can’t happen because I know I can’t do it. It’s like I’m saying, ‘God, I’ve tried this. It won’t work. It’s a bummer, but don’t bother trying, it’s impossible.’
Nothing is impossible with You.
Why don’t I realize that? I don’t realize how BIG You are. I don’t realize how good and loving and all-powerful You are. I look at myself and I see my limitations and I say, ‘Well, there are some things that can’t be done. There are some things I will just have to live with and deal with and I don’t like it but there’s nothing to be done.’
But that’s me lying to myself. My God, You are bigger than that. You are mighty to save. You are big and good and You love me, and You save.
Sometimes it is very hard to love. But that’s when I think about Jesus. How hard it must have been to contain all that power in human flesh, especially when it was being ripped open for people who spat in His face. I choose love, because He did.
I'm whispering, "I get lost! That's why I chose this way"
When I say, "I am a Christian," I don't speak with human pride
I'm confessing that I stumble-needing God to be my guide
When I say, "I am a Christian," I'm not trying to be strong
I'm professing that I'm weak and pray for strength to carry on
When I say, "I am a Christian," I'm not bragging of success
I'm admitting that I've failed and cannot ever pay the debt
When I say, "I am a Christian," I don't think I know it all
I submit to my confusion asking humbly to be taught
When I say, "I am a Christian," I'm not claiming to be perfect
My flaws are far too visible but God believes I'm worth it
When I say, "I am a Christian," I still feel the sting of pain
I have my share of heartache which is why I seek His name
When I say, "I am a Christian," I do not wish to judge
I have no authority--I only know I'm loved
Copyright 1988 Carol Wimmer
To see You high and lifted up, shining in the light of Your glory. Pour out Your power and Love, as we sing "Holy Holy Holy".
"Father, let me be weak that I might lose my clutch on everything temporal. My life, my reputation, my possessions. Lord, let me loosen the tension of the grasping hand. Open my hand to receive the nail of Calvary, as Christ's was opened — that I, releasing all, might be released, unleashed from all that binds me now. So let me release my grasp."Source: westandlikemountains
Stand by their side, hold them close to You, dry their tears, whisper into their ears, "I am here for you, I love you, I sent my son to die for you. You are not alone, I am here. You are not unloved for I love you. There is hope because Jesus is alive."
I just heard about a girl on tumblr whose cousin committed suicide tonight. I know you were there with her, Lord. But for her to take her own life, she must have felt so alone, unaware that you could save her.
Comfort her family right now, and for all those in similar situations, Lord, I ask you to make your presence known to them. I don't want anyone to suffer when they don't have to. Let them know you are there, that you haven't abandoned them, that they are worth something to You.
In the name of Jesus I pray, Amen.
Do not be afraid, for I have ransomed you. I have called you by name; you are mine. When you go through deep waters, I will be with you. When you go through rivers of difficulty, you will not drown. When you walk through the fire of oppression, you will not be burned up; the flames will not consume you.Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest
Isaiah 43:1-2 | Matthew 11:28
Yet, people have forsaken You, and created their own god, in their own sinful image; a mental or physical idol whom they worship, who has no power, no life, no love and provides no means for salvation.
Unblind them Lord, wake them up, open their eyes and give life to their souls.
Forgive me for questioning, and shaking my head to "Is it worth it?"
That video; persecution of our brothers and sisters for your name's sake.
I don't know what it costs to serve you, I don't know how much it cost you to save me.
I don't know, and I don't know if I want to know.
I'm scared to know.
For any body reading this, I've warned you, don't watch this. I was warned. I thought I can handle it, but... my hand is still over my mouth.
For any body reading this, do watch this movie. As horrific as it is, we need to know the truth, we need to know what's happen around the world. This is reality, this is our battle; not against men who are blinded, but against Satan, and his demonic forces.
"For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places." - Ephesians 6:12
"Forgive them, Father, for they know not what they do." - Luke 23:34
Please let everything work out for the best.
Thank you :)
He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; by his wounds you have been healed - 1 Peter 2:24
Then Jesus said to his disciples, "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it. What good will it be for a man if he gains the whole world, yet forfeits his soul? Or what can a man give in exchange for his soul? - Matthew 16:24-26
I live not for myself, but for You.
I don't take credit it for it at all, because I was GREATLY inspired by my tumblr layout lol.
I guess all along You preparing me for this.
First, my post called "When is Enough Enough?", then my conversation about it to my mom, then the reference to it at church about Elijah and how to told him to stop preaching, because the people didn't want to listen, and then my friend asking me questions about the Gospel!
Coincidence? I think not!
Lord, you are amazing! For the first time in my life, I experience, appreciate and understand the concept of "planting a seed". But this has nothing to do with me, this is all You're doing.
Thank you for whispering to her soul. Maybe she doesn't realize it now, but You are at work in her life, You are knocking on the door to her heart, You are stirring up a curiosity to know more.
Enough with what people say, but it's time to hear what YOU have to say!
Lord, I pray that You will not let her go, I want her to be saved. Please give me the wisdom to speak Your word. I know when I talk, I can sound confusing, so if you choose me again to be the one to talk to her, give me the words to say, Lord God!
AAAAaaaaamen!
Let's be real here. Getting rejected is the worst. Okay, maybe not the worst, but it still smarts. Whether it be rejection from the school play auditions, or by the store manager when applying for a new job, or even by the boy that you've been mad-crushing on, rejection makes you feel like the bottom of your world just dropped out. Low self-esteem anyone? I thought 2010 was gonna be a year full of opportunities to make something of myself, to throw myself out there and make a name. But so far it's just been full of rejections. It seems like everything I dedicate my time and effort to just ends in disappointment. I spent a couple of days crying, trying to sort things out. I wondered, what am I doing with my life? Everything I try ends in failure, so why should I even bother? I felt foolish. I felt stupid. But mostly I felt down. Really down.So I prayed to God, asking Him to show me a sign, or just to please give me something that could show me what to do. But try as I might, I heard nothing. One day I just locked the door and sat down on my bed, tears getting ready to fall any moment, and flipped open my Bible.
The thought of my pain, my homelessness, is bitter poison. I think of it constantly, and my spirit is depressed. Yet hope returns when I remember this one thing: The Lord's unfailing love and mercy still continue, Fresh as the morning, as sure as the sunrise. The Lord is all I have, and so in Him I put my hope.
-Lamentation 3: 19-24God loved me. Loves me! Forever! God loves you too! Even if your special crush doesn't like you back, even if your plans fail and everything you hoped and dreamed for comes crashing down, even if your whole life gets turned around, God is always there for you, as sure as the sunrise every morning.
What am I doing with my life? Well I know what I want to be doing. Something for God. I'm tired of just sitting here talking about it, writing songs about it... I wanna do SOMETHING. It's okay if I've gotten rejected by the people and things of the world because God will never reject me. He will always be there for me. And just because I've been rejected before doesn't mean I shouldn't keep putting myself out there and trying new things (not to mention I forgot to count the many many blessings I have, such as a family who loves me very much). I'll admit it, I tried out for the school musical and didn't make it past auditions. But that doesn't mean I should stop writing music or stop trying. I want to use my music to serve God, to worship God, to show the world that God is love and though we may not understand what He's doing or why He's doing it, He's still God, the God I serve and will continue to serve for the rest of my life. God is my everything. He's my purpose. He's my life.
Time to get into action.
Christ died for it; your freedom.
If it's worth dying for, it's worth having.
Take It.
Freedom from death
from despair
from fear
from worthlessness
from this world
from yourself.
Freedom to be what God wants me to be, to do what God wants me to do, to have what God has in store for me.
Thank you for what was not lost, but please, so much is gone, I just want them back, please!
You said whatever we ask in Your name, we will receive, that all good things happen to those who love you and obey you, that if we have faith the size of a mustard seed, we can move mountains. So please Lord, I ask, I plead, I beg, Lord please help me get all my stuff back.
I was planning on getting the back up soon, Lord. Why did this have to happen before I got it?
Thank you for all you've done for me, thank you for all that you have provided, thank you for all the times you have come through for me and my family, thank you for always being here, thank you for hearing me and answering my prayers, so please Lord God, I come to you, as your humble daughter, I pray, please, help me get my data back.
IN JESUS NAME I PRAY, Amen.
Second, to what extent should I share the gospel with others? I know the truth of this saying "I can only touch their minds, but You can touch their hearts".
And I am aware of the concept of "planting a seed in peoples lives, and You will take care of the rest".
But when do I give up? When has my duty been fulfilled for a specific individual? I won't stop letting my life and actions be a witness about You, but, when do I stop trying to "convince them".
My words are all over the place right now; to the outside reader they may not understand exactly what I'm trying to say, I'm not expression myself right at all, but I know that You know what I'm trying to say.
I just want some answers.
I could tell them once, I can refer to it again at another time, but if they are convinced that what they believe about you is correct, do I stop there? Do I bother correcting them or showing them "the other way of thinking" or just let them be.
I'm not talking about, randomly going up to someone and preaching the gospel, but when they bring it up.
My friends keep saying things like "I'm a Christian, but I believe everyone is going to heaven, the Bible is wrong, just do good" or "God doesn't care about me, He's too busy for me..."
Stuff like that. I already told them about you, several times. But when do I stop? How many times should I repeat the same thing? If they heard me before and refuse to believe, well... is there any point in me continuing?
Would this repetitive effort serve any purpose? I know the real heart changing work is done by You, so when does my human-"inform their minds" work end?
It's one thing if they keep on asking me questions, I'll gladly answer, but if they don't believe me, well.. what else can I do, other than letting my actions by living godly speak for themselves?
Aarg.
Why am I so easily distracted?
Prayer: Remove the hate and fill it with love, compassion, mercy, forgiveness, patience, kindness, wisdom and grace.
Galatians 5:16-26So I say, live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature. For the sinful nature desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the sinful nature. They are in conflict with each other, so that you do not do what you want. But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under law.
The acts of the sinful nature are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other.
Ephesians 4:29-32
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
They never have to suffer, they stay healthy, and they don't have troubles like everyone else. Their pride is like a necklace, and they commit sin more often than they dress themselves.
Their eyes poke out with fat, and their minds are flooded with foolish thoughts. They sneer and say cruel things, and because of their pride, they make violent threats. They dare to speak against God and to order others around.
God will bring his people back, and they will drink the water he so freely gives. Only evil people would say, "God Most High cannot know everything!" Yet all goes well for them, and they live in peace.
What good did it do me to keep my thoughts pure and refuse to do wrong? I am sick all day, and I am punished each morning.
If I had said evil things, I would not have been loyal to your people. It was hard for me to understand all this!
Then I went to your temple, and there I understood what will happen to my enemies. You will make them stumble, never to get up again. They will be terrified, suddenly swept away and no longer there.
They will disappear, Lord, despised like a bad dream the morning after. Once I was bitter and brokenhearted.
I was stupid and ignorant, and I treated you as a wild animal would. But I never really left you, and you hold my right hand.
Your advice has been my guide, and later you will welcome me in glory. In heaven I have only you, and on this earth you are all I want. My body and mind may fail, but you are my strength and my choice forever.
Powerful LORD God, all who stay far from you will be lost, and you will destroy those who are unfaithful. It is good for me to be near you. I choose you as my protector, and I will tell about your wonderful deeds.
How did You die for all of us? How did you die for the very ones who were killing you, whipping you, spitting on you, ridiculing you, beating you? How did you remain so calm, and loving?
These are the people you died for? You died for the people who were killing you; And all for what? Love? You died for people knowing they will never love you back.
How do you forgive, even the worst of sins? I just don't get it.
Is love really greater than hate? More powerful? More surpassing?
It's humanly impossible for me to be able to have such grace, love, patience and endurance as you demonstrate every day. I can't even bare being hated by one person, but you, you are hated by millions upon millions upon millions... generations after generation.
You even suffered and died for people who will never know you, people who don't even believe you exist.
What worth did you see in us sinners, for you to even conceive a plan like this?
It's humanly impossible for me to even comprehend how deep and wide and everlasting your love is.
Oh Lord, who created the earth and all that is in it, who created the moons and the stars and your beloved people, I don't understand why You love me, but all I need to know is that you do.
Please have mercy on me, and show me your ways, reveal to me your will, change my heart so that I may follow you. Strengthen me and protect me so that I may tell others about you.
So Lord, I ask in the name of Your glorious Son, Christ Jesus, that tomorrow will be a good day. Watch over my family, friends, myself, and the world.
Amen
I worry about the future, I worry I'm wasting my time, I wonder is there a point to all this. Will I one day, down the road, realize I've made a mistake? Will things be ok? Will I be happy? When?
God, give me a hint, something to hold on to. I need some certainty. I just want to know that I'm heading down the right path, I want to know what I should pursue, and how I should pursue it. So many things come at my way, I want to know what I should dodge and what I should grab.
I just don't want any regrets later on.
And I guess, some hope, for the future. Will I be happy? Will I see good days?
Does my hope have any substance? Or is it just an imaginary rope that I'm holding on to?
I just want some insights, a clue, a hint. SOMETHING!
Everything is uncertain, hazy, foggy, unclear. I can't see past 3 feet in front of me.
...
It's good to know, but I just don't feel it right now.
Whatever.
Wow, last night You answered my prayer instantaneously. Not even 20 seconds later, my prayers were answered. Very much on the miracle side.
Forgive me for being surprised that You heard me, and answered me, Lord. Forgive me for having such little faith. I didn't pray without faith, but maybe I prayed out of habit: not expecting nothing, but not expecting something. I don't know, God, but THANK YOU!
Thank you God for the interviews! Wow, the same company I was talking about in the post "In God's Eyes" is the one that I have an interview for, plus another one. Well this one is tomorrow, as You know so Lord, please let it go well. I need to prepare. I should go to bed so I can wake up early. Please help me to wake up early, and be well alert, and prepared by the time I have this interview. Lord, please guide and protect me always, and my family always, and my friends always, Lord.
My life is in Your hands and I place all my trust and faith in You. Not just "trust that you will get me this job" but "trust that whether I get this job or not, that Your will be done in my life, and I trust that you'll lead me down the right path". I love You so much!
God, please, Don't let go of me.
"In God's eyes, there is no judgment, there is only acceptance. God sees your light when all that you can see are your shadows. God loves you more than anyone could ever love you as you really are."
God is so wonderful. I saw this quote just at the right time, along with this picture.
It's amazing. Two seconds before seeing them, I was writing cover letters to apply for internships and I was thinking, I didn't think I was good enough to apply for "this" company because other people said so, other people expect me to fail, I’m not good enough in their eyes and neither will I be in the eyes of the employer.
Well you now what? I serve a living God who created me in His image, whose spirit dwells in me. God says I am good enough, God loves me the way I am, God can provide and take me places I'd never imagine. When I compare God's voice to others, When I compare His opinion of me to those of others, .. there's just no comparison. The foolishness of God is far wiser then the wisdom of men.
Why hinder myself because of what other people say. How foolish can I be to not even try. My only failure was not trying in the first place. Well this is my chance. I'm going to apply for this job and give it all I can. If I don't get it, who cares, God has better things in store for me.
It's in Christ that we find out who we are and what we are living for.
Because of this, everything changes, my perspective on life, my goals, my self concept, how I perceive people. No matter what, I am a winner, because I serve a winning Christ; I am on the winning side.
I have all I need: E T E R N A L - L I F E
What good would it be to gain the whole world, yet lose my soul? What can I give in exchange for my soul? (Mark 8:36)
I am not a role model, I am corrupt.
I am not worthy, I am wicked.
I am not perfect, I am unholy.
I nailed Jesus to the cross and I showed him no mercy.
But still his love for me endures.
And I'm all by myself
And I can't hear You answer my cries for help
I'll remember the suffering Your love put You through
And I will go through the valley If You want me to
Cause I'm not who I was
When I took my first step
And I'm clinging to the promise
You're not through with me yet
So if all of these trials
Bring me closer to you
Then I will go through the fire
If you want me to.
Song: "If You Want Me To" by Ginny Owens
"JESUS is patient, JESUS is kind. JESUS does not envy, JESUS does not boast, JESUS is not proud. JESUS is not rude, JESUS is not self-seeking, JESUS is not easily angered, JESUS keeps not record of wrongs. JESUS does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth. JESUS always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. JESUS never fails"
1 Corinthians 13:4-8
I asked You to take away my habit.
You said, "No. It is not for me to take away, but for you to give it up."
I asked You to make my handicapped child whole.
You said, "No. His spirit is whole, his body is only temporary."
I asked You to grant me patience.
You said, "No. Patience is a byproduct of tribulations; it isn't granted, it is learned."
I asked You to give me happiness.
You said, "No. I give you blessings; happiness is up to you."
I asked You to spare me pain.
You said, "No. Suffering draws you apart from worldly cares and brings you closer to me."
I asked You to make my spirit grow.
You said, "No. You must grow on your own, but I will prune you to make you fruitful."
I asked You for all things that I might enjoy life.
You said, "No. I will give you life, so that you may enjoy all things."
I asked You to help me love others, as much as You love me.
You said, "Ahhhh, finally you have the idea."
Author Unknown
If you wake me each morning with the sound of your loving voice, I'll go to sleep each night trusting in you. Point out the road I must travel; I'm all ears, all eyes before you.
Save me from my enemies, God— you're my only hope! Teach me how to live to please you, because you're my God. Lead me by your blessed Spirit into cleared and level pastureland.
He seems pretty decent. I just hope things stay this way.
But no matter what, I'll continue to trust You for everything. You know the plans You have for me. Not to fall, but to prosper. And you order the steps of a righteous man (or me, in the case).
Sorry for sinning. Please help me to stop. You know what I'm talking about.
I love You.
From this time many of his disciples turned back and no longer followed him. "You do not want to leave too, do you?" Jesus asked the Twelve. Simon Peter answered him, "Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life."John 6:66-68
How can I ever leave you? How can I ever lose faith in You? Where else can I go? Who else can I turn to for love as great as Yours? Who else can give me eternal life?
My friends? Celebrities? My family? Myself? My possessions? The media? The world? The philosophers? The scientists? NO!
There's no one but You
Salvation is found under no other name but Yours (Acts 4:12)
When I'll pass through the waters, You will be with me, and through the rivers, they will not overwhelm me. When I walk through the fire, I will not be burned or scorched, nor will the flame kindle upon I.
I just got the news of the earthquake in Haiti, Lord. I also heard the news of Mommy's friend's granddaughter who is very sick.
Please, be with them, heal them, comfort them, remove all the confusion and sorrow and worry and pain, Lord God.
I don't know exactly what is going on, but I come to you on their behalf. Calm the grounds, prevent the after shock, heal the injured, reunite the separated, comfort the distressed, rebuild the broken, steady the doctors' hands and minds.
They need you. Even for those who don't know you, even those who hate you, they need you whether they believe it or not.
In these devastating times, let some good from this: People finding you, believing in You and in Your Son, Jesus Christ. Let people learn from their architectural mistakes and "unreadyness" so that they will build better structures to withstand such magnitudes of devastation, and for people to be better trained in how to protect themselves from the debris, and to secure finances so that whatever is lost will be regained. Not only for them but for everyone in other places. Even myself!
I love You
My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.
I know your deeds, your hard work and your perseverance. I know that you cannot tolerate wicked men, that you have tested those who claim to be apostles but are not, and have found them false. You have persevered and have endured hardships for my name, and have not grown weary.
Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken your first love. Remember the height from which you have fallen! Repent and do the things you did at first. If you do not repent, I will come to you and remove your lampstand from its place.
But you have this in your favor: You hate the practices of the Nicolaitans, which I also hate.
He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches. To him who overcomes, I will give the right to eat from the tree of life, which is in the paradise of God."
"Do you finally see, My daughter? I have never left you, not even for a moment. I was with you, through all the pain, through all the things you pray to forget. I was with you. I wept over the shadow of leftover-you. I held onto you. I saw what you would be, what I would give you the grace to become. Even in the moments of richest self-hate, I was with you. Your life has been a valley, My daughter. But see? I am pulling you out. You are climbing to the top, just keep your eyes on Me. I am here. Listen to My voice. I am here."
I feel like I'm in deep waters, forever trying to stay afloat; above the water.
Sometimes I sink, sometimes too fast to catch a breath and fill my lungs with air, as if someone or something were pulling me down.
Most times I'm chained to excess weight, baggage containing worries, pain, heartache, burden from the world. People coming to me to release their pain and pile it on me; making me sink, my nose barely above the water, gasping for air.
And then the storms come: strong winds, strong rain, string waves tossing me, burying me in the waters.
Nothing to hold on to until I pause, calm down, trust You and call upon You. You come and pull me up enough to breathe. Up, but not out.
I wait for the day when You will finally pull me out of this cold cold water, and when I can stand with my two feet on solid ground; breaking the chains holding me down and leaving it behind as I walk with You -- away from the past and into eternity.
My arms and legs are getting weary, constantly waving them in the water to keep me up. I need Your strength, Lord. You know the days I stop paddling and let myself sink down. Even when I don't call on You, You pull me up again.
I'm tired.
I really don't know what I'm saying; I don't want to understand what I'm asking You.
I just want rest.
I wish I was able to see You with my own eyes, hear You with my own ears, feel You with my own hands.
I wish would speak and reply to me so that I can hear you with these ears of mine.
You speak to my spirit, but it sometimes leaves me guessing, wondering.
It's a little surprising to me that people are actually nice to me at all.
It's a mystery and I don't even know why. I guess I don't know myself that well. I guess I just have low expectations of how people see me.
I like me, but I get the feeling that people don't.
It's hard to trust others when I don't know what they are thinking. Are they nice because they like me, or do they just want something from me?
The only one I trust is You.
Lord, reveal to me people's intentions. I know I should be kind to everyone, regardless, but I can't bear the feeling of being used.
Lord, reveal to me Your will; tell me what to do, and how to treat others, whether they like me or not.
You know I needed that, we all need it.
I want to reinvent my love for You, I want to rekindle my love for You, I want MORE OF YOU.
I want to mediate on this:
Revelation 2:4-5
Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken your first love. Remember the height from which you have fallen! Repent and do the things you did at first. If you do not repent, I will come to you and remove your lampstand from its place.
You know my heart, my thoughts, my feelings, so You know I'm worried about how I'm going to do this semester. I want to do well, I want to succeed, I want to exceed my own expectations and those of others who think I'll fail; fail at being great, at succeeding, at being somebody.
Maybe all this negativity is all in my head, but I just need to prove to myself that I can do better. I need to show myself what I can accomplish.
I can only do this with Your help.
I don't just want success in school, but also in every other aspect in my life, and in my future -- especially in regards to our relationship and my relationship with others. I want my friends and family to be saved. But I know I tend to hold back, to hide my faith and what I believe in.
But when I really think about it, only a fool would be ashamed of something so wonderful. I'm not ashamed but You know me, I don't like ridicule, I don't like confrontation or conflict. I'm just not bold enough on my own. So I ask You to help me to be bold, to stick by my side at all times and help me in every situation so that I can bring more glory for You.
The thought crossed my mind yesterday, and maybe it was You speaking to me, but I see all these godless and perishing people walking the street, parading and freely and boldly showing what they believe and stand for. So why must I hide? Why should I hinder Your kingdom and the opportunities for others to hear Your word?
I have every right to display who I am and what I stand for, and who I stand for. And I stand for You, Jesus.
Help me to be bold
Your merciful love couldn't have dried up.
They're created new every morning.
How great Your faithfulness!
I'm sticking with You
(I say it over and over).
You're all I've got left.
When sorrows like sea billows roll;
Whatever my lot, thou hast taught me to say,
It is well, it is well with my soul.
I've definitely grown closer to You. The prodigal daughter is back after about two years of placing You second place.
But all that has changed. I even had the chance to complete my New Testament reading. I also got a chance to read Soul Cravings which opened my eyes a bit more to my purpose here, my duties, and Your love for me. It has also given me some answers to speak to my non-Christian friends.
With Your grace and protection I was able to witness to a couple of my friends, to plant spiritual seeds, which I pray You will water, let grow and allow me to nurture. You've answered my prayers by giving me boldness to speak Your Word of love, life and truth.
I had the time to continue working on my website and I have gained some visitors who actually reach past the first page.
I've also heard Your voice and felt Your presence within me.
I know there are more things but in all of these I have nothing to boast, because it is all due to Your grace, mercy, love and work in me.
I know there is more that I could have done and I'm sorry for all the times I disobeyed, ignored Your voice, and for times that I did not take initiative.
Lord, I want 2010 to be different; better. As long as You keep me alive I pray that I will submit myself completely to Your will. Please remove anything any worldly distractions, please protect me as You send me out into the world as a sheep among wolves, stay by me daily and guide me to fulfill Your will.
Help me to not be afraid.
Thank you for everything You've done for me, for keeping me well and alive all these years, thank You for Your love, mercy, grace, for salvation; I would be nothing without You.
Glory to the New Born King
Died to save us from our sins
But don't forget He rose again!
He born and died to set us free
With eternal life for us to keep
The lame to walk the blind to see
What a wonderful thing He did for you and me
If only you'd believe.
Merry Christmas Everyone!
- Terri
Lord, I'm sick of this "Happy Holidays" junk.
Are people so stupid, so ignorant, so hateful against everything pure and holy? Society seems to not realize this deliberate and brain washing act to completely remove any remembrance of You; You, who came to earth to die for our sins.
It's sickening. If people use the excuse that the holidays encompass both Christmas and New Year, why is it that people say "Happy Holidays and Happy New Year"? Why is it that after Christmas day passes, people are at liberty to say "Happy New Years". Why do companies ban any mention of the word "Christmas" in their fliers, advertisements, and they ban employees from wishing their customers "Merry Christmas".
When was the last time I heard "Christmas" on TV? Why all of a sudden "Christmas" is rarely seen in advertisements anymore?
It's sickening.
You were right, when you said the world hates you, and hates us who follow you.
But I love you, I appreciate all that you've done.
Thank you Jesus, and Happy Birthday!
My spirit speaks to my heart
My heart speaks to my mind
My heart speaks to my body
"My heart, my mind, my soul belongs to you"
Your sheep heard Your voice today
"I tell you the truth, the man who does not enter the sheep pen by the gate, but climbs in by some other way, is a thief and a robber. The man who enters by the gate is the shepherd of his sheep. The watchman opens the gate for him, and the sheep listen to his voice. He calls his own sheep by name and leads them out. When he has brought out all his own, he goes on ahead of them, and his sheep follow him because they know his voice. But they will never follow a stranger; in fact, they will run away from him because they do not recognize a stranger's voice." - John 10:1-5
I heard your voice today, and I obeyed. Sorry for trying to fight it off, sorry for the battle between my will and Your will. Thank you for softening my heart, thank you for providing me a way to get home, thank you my feet didn't hurt after all the walking and extra walking, thank you for choosing me for such a task as this.
Thank you, because I know that Your will can never bring me where Your grace cannot keep me.
But what does it really mean to forgive? When You forgive me, You clean any records of my sins, You remember them no more, You won't hold them against me.
But I still remember what they've done to me and the words they've said to me. And it still bothers me. I forgive, but I can't forget.
I forgive them to the extent that I don't hold it against them, but the fact of the matter is, it's still holding on to me.
It still hurts.
They never apologized. They never took it back. They left it with me.
It still hurts.
What does it mean to forgive?
If forgiving means to forgive as You forgive me...
Since forgiving means to forgive others as You forgive me, then I guess I've never really forgiven anybody; then does that mean You've never forgiven me?
Lord, help me, show me Your will. I know Your Word but it's like, all I can do is hear it. How do I apply it? How do I live it?
How do I let it go? I want to be free; free from the hurt, the pain, the memories.
"I want to believe that if I never hear a sorry, that I can let it go. I have to let them go. It's killing me. Jesus, You know know how it feels, because You've been there before, I don't want to hurt anymore."- Kirk Franklin - Help Me Believe
"I wanna heal, I wanna feel what I thought was never real. I wanna let go of the pain I've held so long. I will never feel anything else, until my wounds are healed" - Linkin Park - Somewhere I Belong
Help me, please.
Light of the world You stepped down into darkness. Opened my eyes, let me see. Beauty that made this heart adore You, Hope of a life spent with You
King of all days oh, so highly exalted Glorious in heaven above Humbly You came To the earth You created All for love's sake became poor
Here I am to worship, Here I am to bow down, Here I am to say that You're my God You're altogether lovely All together worthy, All together wonderful to me
I'll never know how much it cost To see my sin upon that cross
Song:Chris Tomlin - Here I Am To Worship
No, that's not the man in red. It's Jesus, our Savior, red from the blood shed all the way to the cross; who was beaten, whipped, scorned, insulted, crucified.
He took our place, our punishment, our sins, our guilt, our shame.
Our sins has left a crimson stain, but He washed us white as snow.
As He bled, He bore our sins, our crimson stain so that we can partake in His righteousness.
Jesus, the Man in red, the God in glory.
Isaiah 1:18
"Come now, let's settle this," says the Lord."Though your sins are like scarlet, I will make them as white as snow. Though they are red like crimson, I will make them as white as wool."
Thank you, Jesus, for all that you've done for me, for dying so that I may have life, for redeeming me, loving me, for being as close as the mention of Your wonderful name: Jesus, Prince of Peace, Emmanuel, God with us, Redeemer, Savior, Lord of Lords, my best friend.
"Jesus, be a fence all around me every day. Lord, I want You to protect me as I travel along life's way. I know You can, I know You will, fight my battles as I stand still. Be a fence all around me every day."
You are teaching me how to love myself.
Here today and gone tomorrow,
A wave tossed in the ocean,
A vapor in the wind.
Still you hear me when I'm calling,
Lord, you catch me when I'm falling,
And you've told me who I am.
I am yours.
Casting Crowns - "Who Am I"
You have swept away my offenses like a cloud, my sins like the morning mist. I will return to You, for You have redeemed me.
Create pure thoughts in me and make me faithful again. Don't chase me away from you or take your Holy Spirit away from me. Make me as happy as you did when you saved me; make me want to obey!
Colossians 2:14 | Isaiah 44:22 | Psalms 51:10-12
2-6 The servant grew up before God - a scrawny seedling, a scrubby plant in a parched field. There was nothing attractive about him, nothing to cause us to take a second look. He was looked down on and passed over, a man who suffered, who knew pain firsthand. One look at him and people turned away. We looked down on him, thought he was scum. But the fact is, it was our pains he carried - our disfigurements, all the things wrong with us. We thought he brought it on himself, that God was punishing him for his own failures. But it was our sins that did that to him, that ripped and tore and crushed him - our sins! He took the punishment, and that made us whole. Through his bruises we get healed. We're all like sheep who've wandered off and gotten lost. We've all done our own thing, gone our own way. And God has piled all our sins, everything we've done wrong, on him, on him.
7-9 He was beaten, he was tortured, but he didn't say a word. Like a lamb taken to be slaughtered and like a sheep being sheared, he took it all in silence. Justice miscarried, and he was led off - and did anyone really know what was happening? He died without a thought for his own welfare, beaten bloody for the sins of my people. They buried him with the wicked, threw him in a grave with a rich man, Even though he'd never hurt a soul or said one word that wasn't true.
10Still, it's what God had in mind all along, to crush him with pain. The plan was that he give himself as an offering for sin so that he'd see life come from it - life, life, and more life. And God's plan will deeply prosper through him.
11-12 Out of that terrible travail of soul, he'll see that it's worth it and be glad he did it. Through what he experienced, my righteous one, my servant, will make many "righteous ones," as he himself carries the burden of their sins. Therefore I'll reward him extravagantly - the best of everything, the highest honors - Because he looked death in the face and didn't flinch, because he embraced the company of the lowest. He took on his own shoulders the sin of the many, he took up the cause of all the black sheep.
Why would You do something like that for me? Is it because I love You? Is it because I'm a good person? No, it's because You love me. Simple. It's Your grace, mercy, love and kindness.It's amazing: while I was still a sinner You died for me. While I hated you, you died for me. As I was crucifying You, hurling insults at You, beating you down, You took it all. Forgive me, I didn't know what I was doing.
Bring me back to You, God - I'm ready to come back. Give me a fresh start.
Romans 5:8 | Lamentations 5:21
...Seven days without God makes one Weak.
This was then (December 12, 2008):
I want to know who I am, where I belong, what I should seek, what to feel, I just want to know. I feel like there's a blank in my life, as if I'm just walking here aimlessly, depending on others to tell me what to do, how to feel. I want to rediscover Terri-Anne. I feel like there's no one to turn to, no one to tell how I feel, no one who understands me, no one who truly cares.
This is now (November 25, 2009):
After the 3 years, I'm back to normal; back to the real world and it's great. I survived three straight semesters of school, I started my stage, though it's ending in a month, so sad. I've had my ups and downs but I'm alright now.
This is my favorite quote that I wrote: "Life is breaking me in pieces but God is keeping me from falling apart".
Plus, I turned 21. Dona is so awesome, plus my other friends, who planned a surprise thingy for me and for giving me such an awesome gift: a super cool wallet plus 40$ American. I'm not like "!!! MONEYY" but it looked so hot in my wallet, and it was all 1$ so it looked like 1000 dollars hahaha. Anyways, not much to say. I'm getting back in touch with God. I never really left, but I feel God really at work in my life, revealing His will in my life. It's a wonderful thing to feel His presence, to feel Him talking to you, telling you what He wants you to do. I've always asked him to use me for His will and He is. And I pray that I'll follow through with faith, no matter how impossible it looks, or how scary it is, or how much it would cost of my life.
When I have the time, and if I know I'll follow through with it, I'll turn this from a diary to a prayer, just talking to God, telling Him how I feel, telling Him about my doubts, my pain, and my happiness; it'll really reflect the name of my blog, "Lamentations".
I remember while listening to that church service in Trinidad, someone was signing and this line caught my attention: "I don't want to talk about God as if He's not here" because He is here, all the time. And when I reflect about my times of trouble and I cry out to Him, I can write about how He's brought me through, so that the next time I go through tough times, I can read about my past experiences, and know that God has brought me through, and He'll bring me through again. It'll strengthen my faith and my hope. ok c'est tout.
This should keep me going:
"I have swept away your offenses like a cloud, your sins like the morning mist. Return to me, for I have redeemed you."-Isaiah 44:22
When, Lord, when? Any day now would be good.